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Stories

25 Hilarious Food Tweets By Parents Who Are At Their Wits’ End Trying To Feed Their Kids

by Zack Walkter

4 years ago

“My son’s superpower is to turn 1 cracker into 10 pounds of crumbs.”

1.

Have kids so you can listen to miniature versions of yourself cry because you cut up a pancake instead of leaving it big.

— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) September 12, 2017

2.

[At dinner]
Daughter: Daddy, how much of this meatball is meat?
Me: Probably like 90%
D: So it's 10% balls?
Me: *spits out food*

— Tim (@Playing_Dad) January 3, 2016

3.

Grocery shopping with kids is just saying "put that back!" every 30 seconds until everyone is crying.

— Toni Hammer (@thetonihammer) January 13, 2017

4.

Parenthood is full of surprises. Fix your child's favorite breakfast, yogurt with peaches, and SURPRISE! They now hate yogurt. And peaches.

— MyMomologue (@MyMomologue) June 22, 2017

5.

Apparently I pack an apple in my 5 year old's lunch so it can get out of the house for a few hours.

— Brian Hope (@Brianhopecomedy) April 15, 2013

6.

4-year-old: Why do you go to work?

Me: They pay me a salary.

4-year-old:

Me:

4-year-old: I don’t even like celery.

— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) February 28, 2015

7.

What I say: No fruit snacks for breakfast.

What my toddler hears: EVERYBODY GETS FRUIT SNACKS! pic.twitter.com/9T6tk2VOX8

— Jennifer S. White (@yenniwhite) October 17, 2016

8.

Toddlers are fun if you like being woken up from a dead sleep by someone force-feeding you gummi bears.

— Unfiltered Mama (@UnfilteredMama) September 16, 2017

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