Doctors Reveal Their Funniest And Dumbest Patient Stories

7. “I’m a veterinary technician. I once had to explain to a frantic client that the ticks she had frantically been trying to remove from her male dog’s belly with tweezers were actually his nipples. I also told her she had an extremely well behaved, patient dog.”—WhiteDiabla

She must have thought that those were some stubborn ticks!

8. “Another vet here… Dead bodies decompose! If you leave your dead dog I euthanized in the back of your car on the hottest day of the year, don’t come crying to me when its belly fills with putrefying gases and bursts.”—TheBoyTucker

“Demanding I cover the costs of reupholstering your car might be considered a little rude as well.”

9. “A hospital is open 24 hours a day 7 days a week for medical emergencies. So, the next time you have a stroke on a Friday, come in on Friday and don’t wait for the weekend to pass!”—SuperSharpSherpa

“No honey, don’t bother calling an ambulance. I wouldn’t want to bother them right when their weekend is about to begin.”

10. “A child can not have inherited any genetic traits from someone the mother has previously been with. Only one man is the biological father.”—I_am_solipsism

Did somebody really think that he shared DNA with his mother’s exes?

11. “Had a lady measure her baby’s temperature by pre-heating the oven and putting one hand in front of it while the other hand was on the baby’s forehead. She told the nurse her baby’s fever was about 250 degrees.”—jps1023

As a general rule, babies and ovens do not mix!

Credits: boredomtherapy

What was the funniest story you ever heard? Let us know below. Share this story on Facebook with your friends.